jem at 25.JPG

25 things I have learned at age 25:

  1. Forgive them, forgive yourself. It is so important to forgive people that have hurt you in the past. Don’t wait for an apology. I will never forget that night, almost 5 years ago, when I felt the Spirit prompt be to read an article on forgiveness. it forever changed my view on it. I realized that the power was within me. Waiting for an apology in order to forgive someone puts the power in their hands. Sometimes people hurt you on purpose but most of the times they don’t and they have moved on. We should always seek to see the best in others and forgive them and in turn ourselves. Forgiveness does not always mean that everything goes back to normal but it means that you wont use what they did against them and against yourself. It’s freeing trust me.
  2. Dream BIG. Your dreams should make you uncomfortable. I have big dreams, silly and impossible dreams and I love each and every one of them. I have a feeling I am crazy enough to have them come through for me. With God all things are possible. Make sure you aren’t pursuing someone else’s dream but yours. Work hard on it and succeed (and shame the devil!).
  3. Happy yourself. Happiness is an inside job, it comes from within. I feel bad for people that need others to be happy. Happiness does not come from people, or things, or food. True happiness comes from within. You don’t have to depend on anyone for it. Just you and the Spirit that dwells within.
  4. Appreciate the people that were in your life, are in your life and will come into your life.  This one is powerful. I absolutely appreciate the people that are in my life. I may not always have the right words to tell them but I pray for them and I do feel truly blessed to have a great support system. But I also appreciate the people that were in my life because they contributed in a way, big or small, to the person that I am today. And of course, those that are still to come. I am open to positive vibes so whoever is going to come into my life with positive energy, I can not wait to meet.
  5. Failure is good. I don’t love failure but I have come to enjoy it in a weird way. I mean, I would much rather succeed but I really don’t mind failing. It’s like a new chance to become even better and aim even higher. People that are afraid of failing usually wont start. There is no bigger failure than not starting at all.
  6. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Fear, we all know it. I used to be afraid of fear. It used to cripple me and sometimes it still does. But I am learning to feel it and still do whatever it is I was going to do. Because 9 times out of 10, the thing you were scared of happens to be the best thing that could happen to you.
  7. Be generous with your resources. Generosity is key. OMG. Can I take a moment to preach on this though? It’s so interesting because I don’t have a lot of money, my family doesn’t have a lot of money but God always comes through. Reason? Generosity. From a young age my parents have taught me to be generous with my time, money, attention, love. So any time I get the opportunity to bless someone, I try to do it. It is not because I have a lot of resources at hand but because God expects it from me. I serve a generous God, it is the least I could do for his children.
  8. Loosen up, everything is not that deep. This one is for me because I tend to have a hard time loosening up. I am a hard worker and usually have a hard time switching up the modes. But the truth is everything isn’t that deep. The thing you’re stressing about today may not be relevant anymore tomorrow.
  9. Never give up on love. I love love. Love is amazing. It makes you happy, bold, positive, strong. But sometimes when misused it can make you lose trust. But true love conquers all. People that give up on love become bitter and bitterness shows on your face. Never give up on love, it is the essence of life.
  10. Invest in your (physical, emotional, spiritual) wellbeing. I am not always the best when it comes to this but I have learned to value it. I love to invest in myself by reading, writing, praying, exercising and eating healthy. I often fail but I don’t give up!
  11. Racism is still alive but that won’t stop me. I know.. people are bored of hearing/talking about it but it doesn’t change the fact. It is still alive but I have learned to rise above it. Literally, whether you love me or hate me because of my outward appearance that it your problem. I continue to rise and I absolutely love myself. If they won’t give you the job, create your own! If you can sit with them, create your own space! You don’t need anyone that isn’t rooting for you. Develop your fullest potential and nobody can stop you.
  12. “I don’t have the time” is an excuse so stop saying it. Ha! I say it too. But the truth is that you make time for what you want and that is okay. Stop blaming it on time. Everyone in this world has 24 hours in a day and people are doing great things within those hours and so can you.
  13. It’s okay to say NO. I am learning this. I really am. I am learning to say no to things I don’t want to do or places I don’t want to go. I don’t have to please everyone. Saying no doesn’t make me wicked… it makes me human!
  14. Don’t body shame, just don’t. Think its safe to say that almost every person in the world has at some point experienced body shaming. I can’t act like a saint and say that I havent done it before. It’s either you’re too fat, too skinny, too tall, too short, etc. etc. But the truth is that confident people don’t need to body shame because they are happy with themselves and therefore see beauty in others too. So next time you’re about to shame someone, take a look at yourself and if you feel like you’re perfect then proceed.
  15. JESUS = GOD. I know that christians don’t always get the best reputation but I am a proud follower of Christ and will gladly tell you about it and explain why. First time I heard that Jesus is actually God I was confused. But I now fully understand and it is just a beautiful thing to know that God would humble himself so much to come to earth in a human form and die for our sins.
  16. Pray and meditate. Prayer is key. I have gone through periods where I would silently hurt and even though I had amazing people around me I felt completely alone. It is prayer that helped me know and understand that there is someone much bigger than me that is taking care of me. Pray for yourself but more especially pray for others and watch God manifest the things you asked him for.
  17. READ BOOKS. I am a sucker for good books. I love to read books especially on business, christianity, self-help, love. Reading books has helped me understand the world and people much better. It has helped me in my speech and performance. It has enabled me to have deep discussions with people much older than me. Moral of it: READ BOOKS!! lol..
  18. Don’t settle for mediocrity.  Never settle for less. Not in love, not in school, not in work, not in ANYTHING. You deserve the best. Just invest in yourself.
  19. Don’t tell your dreams and visions too soon. I have done this before and missed out on things. Some things are for a specific time. Habbakuk 2 tells us to write down the vision for a set time. When God gives you a dream or vision hold on to it and watch him manifest it. You don’t always have to talk too much. Let your actions speak for you.
  20. You become like the people you hang out with the most. What is it again? You become like the 5 people you hang out with the most. Yeah, so whatever you’re trying to become: rich, successful, happy, devoted believer, smart well those are the kind of people you need to hang with.
  21. Speak up. Don’t always keep things to yourself. I am a deep thinker but I am learning to speak up. It is okay to let people know what’s going on in your mind and in your life. It is okay to ask for help or offer help. It is also okay to speak up for those that cant speak for themselves. Be a voice.
  22. FEMINISM. I am a feminist. At least I like to think I am. But this word means different things to different people. Now before you start throwing tomatoes at me let me explain. When I say that I am a feminist all I mean to say is that I believe in equal rights for men and women. I am not saying that men and women are exactly the same because we are clearly not. But it doesn’t mean that I cannot have a discussion with a man or that my place of belonging is in the kitchen or that I shouldn’t study and get as many degrees as I would like. To many this is common sense but not to all. So if you are a chauvinist, I will find you and I will KI.. kick you with my words lol.
  23. Celebrate other people’s achievements. We should be like Tyra Banks (“I was ROOTING for you.”) We should root, support other people. I am so grateful when I get to invest in others. Literally people that only want to make it themselves usually don’t make it. That’s just not how life works. Celebrate other people’s achievements. When people around you are succeeding it means your blessing is around the corner.
  24. Everyone doesn’t have to like you, doesn’t make them a hater either. Some people love to dwell on their so-called haters. Why would you want everyone to love you? People like or love you based on what they think they know about you. We are human beings so we will misunderstand each other. It is okay.
  25. No one is perfect. At the end of the day no one is perfect and I am so happy for that. We are all different and that is exactly how God intended for it to be. Perfect is boring, it means you have arrived.